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Showing posts from 2004

Over 70 000 dead.

I was telling my boss yesterday that this'll be the disaster of my lifetime. Not only are the nations directly hit by the tsunamis affected, but the tourists from other nations are also affected. 3 000 Norwegians were vacationing in Thailand, and as of this writing, 300 are still not accounted for. For Sweden, the numbers are much higher. Tamils living in Norway have lost many family members on Sri Lanka. And the earthquake was so huge, it even shifted the planet a little! I'm trying to understand why this is affecting me so. There have been other disasters and – awful as this sounds – 70 000 is nothing compared to the millions that have died of hunger and disease in Africa over the years. So why is this particular event getting my attention? The only thing I can say is, I'm not alone. Many Norwegians are choosing to spend less money on fireworks for this New Year's celebration, and giving money to various humanitarian organizations to help the victims of the

40 questions (as it turns out)

Stolen from Ultraviolet 1. Name the last four things you have bought: Ack, my darned attention deficiency! Uhm, oh! Bejeweled 2 for my Zire 72, and, ah... Can we do last four things I actually remember? OK, new mouse with right button and scroll wheel and pretty little yellow and orange fishes on a blue background; Christmas decorations for my Mom and a friend and a big Christmas ornament showing Bryggen for me, and, er, oh, the groceries. (Hrmph. Nobody said it'd be on the test.) 2. Name four drinks you regularly drink: Easy! Coffee, coffee, coffee and water. 3. Last time you cried? If almost counts, last night. If actual tears, then day before yesterday, when I laughed so hard, I cried. Good ol' fashioned bawl? Last year, I think. 4. What's in your CD player? Cat fur. CDs play well in spite of that. 5. What's under your bed? You don't wanna go there. Trust me. 6. What time did you wake up today? What? I was supposed to notice

My thoughts about things not being what they were

I never thought I would "outgrow" company parties. When I started as a young thing, all generations were represented at the parties and no one was left out. I feel I've lost touch with people, and I wonder (yet again) if my future lays with this company. I just turned 44 (on Dec 3rd), and though that feels like nothing to me (I still feel young inside), I realize my years of being the youngest must be nearing their end. You see, I have always been the youngest in class (with one exception), and in the various departments I've been in at work. Even when my current department was hiring a printer, my boss managed to hire an old friend about his age (50-ish), so I remain the youngest. (The other candidate considered for hiring was 29.) We now have a very high average age in my department, and sometimes I think I should leave it and take my weird "jinx" with me, so they can hire some younger folks and have a future. Where would I go, though? That I haven'

It sucks to be me

No, it doesn't, really. But right now it does. Rather, some parts of my life suck. Every year, my employer throws a big Christmas ball. Attendance is voluntary and with a "deductible". With the exception of one year, our ball is held at the same hotel every year. I've been employed by the same company for over 21 years, and have attended the ball at least 10 times. It's a tradition and I love the elegant ladies and stylish gentlemen. Also, we are a dancing bunch. The folks from my firm love to boogie. A good band is more important than good food. My body isn't what it used to be; I've lost my waistline completely. Now I'm going to try some a yoga programme to try to lose weight. (In case you're wondering, the positions are: Warrior, Candle, Bow, Plough, Fish, Pulling in the stomach, Pump and Twist.) Anyway, this meant shopping for new clothes for Christmas, and I found a long, satiny black skirt that fit well and which I wore with a black long-

All's hallow

The halfway point between the beginning of seasons (in this case autumn and winter) was also celebrated in the old days, and is remembered as today's Halloween, previously All Hallow's Eve. All Hallow's Day is remembrance of our dead loved ones. It's all about spirits of the dead. In my case, it's been all about the spirits of the living, too: Specifically mine. I am reading a book by Emmet Fox, "Diagrams for Living: The Bible Unveiled" , an interpretation of the Bible's stories as metaphors and allegories for how to handle human struggles. I recognized Fox's (no relative) take on Noah's ark as a parable for how to create peace of mind in the midst of big problems in my own experience in Aurlandsdalen : Build a place in your mind (ark) that helps you focus on the spiritual (stay afloat) instead of letting the problem get to you (drown in the flood). In Aurlandsdalen, I found myself worrying about this and that, and so had to put out

Autobiographical

I am feeling restless and have the urge to do something. I can't, however, seem to wrap my head around the weather astrology, that is, I can't seem to find the focus for it. And so, my goal of trying to make a weather forecast for the autumn in Bergen using astrology, is put on the back burner. I wonder sometimes if I should keep doing astrology. Well, that's another matter. Right now, the matter is the book I have inside of me. I attended the Raptus festival last weekend, Norway's comics convention, and observed that a lot of artists are actually drawing themselves. One artist's thick, short eyebrows show up in all his male characters. Another artist does large, round eyes, which he has. Yet another lends his thick, short hair to his characters, and a slight woman with small features and huge eyes is mirrored in her main female character. Which all made me think of writers. It is said that every writer's first novel is actually an autobiography. Wr

Letting go, letting God

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Some time in high school: A friend: "Let Jesus be in the driver's seat." Me: "Naw, I'll drive. Jesus can be the navigator." Jesus never did get to ride shotgun with me, but finally God did get to chauffeur. This past weekend. My department of nine people is made of six men with outdoors interests and three women without. The annual social in our department therefore usually consists of hiking or fishing. This year's trip was no different. We were headed for Aurlandsdalen , a canyon carved by the Aurland river, starting at a mountain lodge called Østerbø Fjellstove and ending at the bottom in the village of Vassbygdi. I'm not used to hiking and so was nervous about the trip. However, one of my female co-workers, G, is deaf, and she was determined to go. She bought herself new hiking boots, walking poles (her sense of balance is destroyed by her hearing loss), rucksack, Thermos and I guess some other gear. We discussed back and forth how to do

Interesting times

"May you live in interesting times" say the Chinese – and mean it as a curse. If things are constantly changing around you, there is no peace. As usual, my own little life is not interesting. (More about that farther down.) But the news is currently full of all kinds reports about lives elsewhere being far too interesting. Terrorists killing school children in Chechnya, one hurricane after another pummeling the Caribbean, Florida and soon the Mexican Gulf, odd-ball accidents (traffic and otherwise) and tragic murders (like the report in Sweden of a 16 year old stabbing a 14 year old). And of all things, a mosquito problem in Arizona (arid Arizona!), spreading the West Nile virus (the mosquitos breed in neglected swimming pools). I'm sure I've missed something, but that'll do. It's enough interesting times. Why did I say "as usual" about my "uninteresting" life? Well, when I was a kid, I was in the Brownies and my grandma was driving s

Memes and chain letters

In my last blog , I participated in a meme. I followed the link (Minding the Planet) to discover that this particular meme is now "closed" and another one has started in its place. Did I want to participate in this next incarnation as well? That's when it hit me: This is just like chain letters! In my childhood, I would get a carefully copied, handwritten letter usually stating that this chain had started in 1959 in some other country, so please don't break it! After one attempt at doing my part and deciding it wasn't worth the bother, I have since taken great pride in breaking chains. So no more memes for me. Not that the idea is invalid or that watching ideas catch on and spread is uninteresting; I just was never any good at following the crowd.

I'm becoming part of a meme

Thusly: This posting is a community experiment that tests how a meme, represented by this blog posting, spreads across blogspace, physical space and time. It will help to show how ideas travel across blogs in space and time and how blogs are connected. It may also help to show which blogs (and aggregation sites) are most influential in the propagation of memes. The dataset from this experiment will be public, and can be located via Google (or Technorati) by doing a search for the GUID for this meme (below). The original posting for this experiment is located at: Minding the Planet (Permalink: http://novaspivack.typepad.com/nova_spivacks_weblog/2004/08/a_sonar_ping_of.html) – results and commentary will appear there in the future. Please join the test by adding your blog (see instructions, below) and inviting your friends to participate -- the more the better. The data from this test will be public and open; others may use it to visualize and study the connectedness of blogspace

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Ran into the cousin of a friend today – A.B. Last fall she started to train to be a home nurse's aid, a two-year education. She dropped out after one semester, she told me. She had second thoughts about her choice of future. I met A.B. several years ago when she was bartending at a night club in town. My friend introduced us. A.B. no longer wants to work at waitressing or bartending, and decided to try the line of work my friend got into: In-house nurse's aid (meaning people who go to people's homes to assist them with bathing, diapering, medicating, feeding, etc. My Grandma received such services for a few years). Such nurse's aids also work in nursing homes. But that last was not for A.B. She said she didn't want to work some place where co-workers don't even greet you when you arrive for work. I totally agreed with her that that wasn't a desirable work situation. Now A.B. was trying to figure out what to do next. She did enjoy going to people's ho

In limbo

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This summer has been a bit odd for me. I feel like I've been in limbo, but after transitting Saturn (astrology's wet blanket) moved away from it's conjunction to my natal Mars (astrology's Dennis the Menace), some of that feeling of limbo lifted. One effect is that I now feel like blogging. It's not like I haven't experienced anything worth blogging about this summer. Or that I haven't had a reason to be in limbo besides the astrological one. So what follows is my version of "What I Did This Summer": Tradition One tradition in Norway is to celebrate Midsummer's Eve (June 23), also called St. John's Eve (Christianity's version of a merger). One especially traditional way to celebrate said eve is by attending the Laksevåg bonfire. Laksevåg is a municipality across the harbor from downtown Bergen and was incorporated into Bergen in 1972. It is the venue for Norway's largest barrel bonfire and this year was its 101st anniversary.

My date with Bergen

I watch the TV-show "Sex and the City" and am catching up on older episodes. In one I saw this weekend, Carrie says no single person is alone in New York City; the whole city's your date. I thought of that today as I walked around in Bergen, alone. Thinking it as a date with the city, rather than being alone in the city, changed my perspective of my day ahead to a much more positive view. I may have mentioned before that I have every second Wednesday off from work. This time, in brilliant summer weather, I had an appointment to get my hair cut (finally!). That nice short cut you see on my main page has grown out a bit, to tuck-behind-the-ears length. And I like it that way. (Also practical for the sunglasses-on-top-of-head look.) Today my hairdresser's was a cheerful, joking place and so was a great start to my day in the city. The coffee was just right, too; not so strong I missed having milk in it. After getting my usual great haircut (Trond is a genius),

Triumph

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I had to do something this morning that I haven't done in years: Go through my own dirty laundry to get what I needed to wear. Today's clingy fabrics look best over a smooth bra. Lacy bras make the fabric look lumpy. But I had absolutely no smooth bras left that a) were clean and (more to the point) b) fit me. Those will be donated to the Salvation Army. But the dive into the laundry hamper told me that I had to buy new bras today . In order not to forget, I set an alarm on my new Zire72 (yes! I have a new toy and I'm very pleased with it) so I wouldn't go straight home out of habit, but stop at the store. Since things got hectic at work and there was a deadline, I had to keep resetting the alarm, but finally, at 6 pm, I left the office and headed for the lingerie. First shock of the day: My tits seem to be huge! They refuse to fit in a 75C/34C (Norwegian and US size). I oozed out on the sides and tops of all the C-cups. I oozed out around the strap in back

Suddenly...spring!

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My stomach acted up this week, after the weekend at my friend's place, celebrating his daughter's confirmation. Much rich food – or perhaps not all that rich, just not what I'm used to. And so for a week, my stomach has not been normal. I've been waking up with a slight tummy ache almost every morning. Time to take my IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) more seriously. Anyway, the result was ending up staying at home from work and a related party. And this same weekend, a heatwave came. Temperatures in the shade of 66F/19C or higher at this time of year, are not the norm, but they seem to becoming the norm. So while I stayed inside, not wanting to brave the heat (heat to me, and also a bit humid), spring arrived in full force. Today I finally had such an urge to get out and walk (and tummy was willing), so I did. I took some pictures, which you can see here: homepage.mac.com/kafox/PhotoAlbum3.html . I was greatly surprised to see that the cherry trees (three in front o

No longer "demoralizing or confusing"

Yesterday, my dentist replaced a cracked filling. Such things have to be filed down and I had to keep biting on carbon paper. But my mouth hurt and I told the dentist that was as good as it was going to get. She said to come back in if the filling needed further filing; it would take only a minute, no appointment necessary. This morning, I was late for work – again. (I'm sort of "on report" for it, too). I stood outside my apartment building, not looking forward to clocking in late. My mouth no longer hurt and I could feel my bite better. So, I finally decided to go back to my dentist and get the filling filed. (This meant clocking in late with a good excuse.) I took the same bus I took yesterday. This time, my bus card was renewed and I got on in the rear. I didn't notice if the woman who sat next to me yesterday came on the bus. I got off in town at the same bus stop as yesterday. Now I was wondering what would happen if the bum was standing on the same corner

Sun Opposition Neptune

My "Personal Daily Horoscope" today from Astrodienst , a serious website and astrological service for both amateurs and professionals: Surreptitious acts This may be a day of considerable confusion and uncertainty. On the other hand, you may gain new awareness of and sensitivity to others and their needs and how they relate to your own. Your encounters with others today may be demoralizing or confusing. Your ego energies are not very high, and you are not in a self-assertive mood for vigorous competition. If someone comes at you aggressively, your natural inclination today is to avoid the confrontation... The interpretation above is for your transit selected for today: Sun Opposition Neptune, activity period from 29 April 2004 to 1 May 2004. Aggression wasn't a problem, but that first paragraph described a couple of incidents that were unusual for me: I had a dentist's appointment this morning, and so was taking the bus. My bus card had expired, so I sat

Hell and such

I've always joked about wanting to go to Hell when I die because I want to be with all my friends in the afterlife. Well, it turns out friends may be scattered, anyway – if this questionnaire about which level of Dante's hell you'll end up in is anything to go by. Here are my results after two tries: First try The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell! Here is how you matched up against all the levels: Level Score Purgatory (Repenting Believers) High Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Low Level 2 (Lustful) Moderate Level 3 (Gluttonous) Moderate Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Moderate Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Moderate Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) Very Low Level 7 (Violent) High Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) High Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) Low Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test Second try: The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory! Here is how you matched up

Magic

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There is magic in our mundane little lives. Too bad so many people don't see it. But I'm happy to be your guide for a few minutes. I attended a stargazing class in March, learning a lot about our nightskies before they got too light. It also clarified a few terms I've used in astrology, like sidereal time. I've discovered that most people don't look up any more. Light pollution can be partially to blame; you can't see much with street lights in your eyes. But mainly it seems that a lot of people just can't be bothered, just don't understand what's so interesting. They no longer know the name of the constellations they once looked at as children. My stargazing teacher was apparantly a man of science: A medical doctor by day and an amateur astronomer by night. He told us about Bodes' Law and my mind made the connection from that mathematical regularity to the science fiction book "Calculating God" by Robert J. Sawyer (where sc

Lighter days

This was the week the snow melted. Granted, there's still snow in the mountains, which should keep the snow bunnies during Easter vacation happy. But here, at sea level, the snow has gone. The rain came and washed away the winter. This morning I heard the seagulls. One sign of spring is the 4 am squawking of seagulls eating worms on the lawns. Or whatever the heck it is the seagulls are doing. I enjoy spring, I like the slow awakening after 3 months or so of gray, naked nature. In February the magpies start to build their nests, and I've been observing several great tits fighting over the bird box my friend Torleif hung up last year. But now I can see the green grass and the ground. I can see a hint of green in trees and bushes as the sap rises. I can even smell the earth. This spring's different for me, though. I have hungered for it. I have longed for the light, the lengthening days, the lessening of storms and bitter cold. I don't quite know why, though I suspe

Where does time go?

Recently my Grandma wanted to know if I was the one who had told her that her mother had died. I am the one who has to remind her that her mother died – way back in the 1960's, but I'm not the one who told her originally. Moments like those make it clear to me that time and memory are linked. One does not function or exist without the other. Time helps us organize our memories; remembering what date it is or how old we were (age as time-keeper), helps us sort events. Lose track of time, and the events no longer line up in sequence, but start to happen all at once. At the very same moment my grandma is talking to her adult granddaughter, I am also my mother and my great-grandmother may or may not still be living. The memories pile on top of each other, and with as much order as any pile (last in, first out). Memory also helps us keep track of time. Remembering what you did today and that it was different from what you did yesterday, actually helps you keep track of the

Subtle mourning

I have discovered that when my mind is scattered, I can't focus on things like writing something sensible in my blog. For what it's worth, I can't focus on things like answering friends in e-mail properly, either, when my mind is like that. I feel like I'm being pulled in umpteen directions emotionally and it's been like that since before Christmas. The main reason is Grandma. Still, yet. I didn't realize until this month why. I didn't realize that I had gone into mourning. It's not the same as actually losing someone in death, and attending a funeral and realizing the finality of it all and just getting used to the idea. Mourning the loss of someone when that someone is still around, living and breathing, is not so obvious. That's why it took me by surprise and still does. But the usual reactions of grief are there: The shock, the disbelief, the anger, the pain of loss. It's a new process for me and I realize that I just

Update on blog of January 21

Updated the princess's chart. It seemed it was hard to see what the aspects were. They weren't reflecting their true geometric place. So this new version of the chart has squishy houses and accurate relative placement of the planets. Same URL as before.

The body knows

It's been a crazy month. I have felt like a teenager again. I have been totally disorganized, scatter-brained, tired, and lazy. It reminds me of myself when I was in my teens. I have had fun searching the Internet for answers. Came up with a whole bunch: I have ADD (attention deficiency disorder). Well, that explains why I never get any work done around the house! So I ordered a book about housekeeping for messies and signed up for an ADD mailing list. Which lead me to conclude I'm: Hypoglycemic. Or was it hyperglycemic. Since I'd already been sniffing around the low-carb diet thing I figured this fit. So I ordered a book called "Sugar Blues" explaining why sugar is a poison (an excerpt can be read here ). And I'd been eating a lot more carbs/sugar this past month. Hrm. But one article about hypoglycemia also mentioned hypoadrenocorticism. So I am hypoadrenocortical or something. Yeah, that's it, because that explains the I

A princess is born

The next one in line for the throne in Norway was born today. A girl. Her name will be announced tomorrow. She's already historical, since Norway hasn't had a queen in 600 years, and because until 1990, no female could be heir apparent to the throne. In 1990, the constitution was changed so that the first-born would be heir apparent, regardless of gender. Anyway, here's the kid's chart . Born in Rikshospitalet (National hospital), Oslo, Norway, at 9:13 am CET. And since I mouthed off on Usenet, I may as well repeat what I said there about my first take on the chart: My take: Not only will she be queen, she'll probably be a lesbian, too. ;-) Seriously: 12th house Sun and Saturn retrograde suggest an absent father. With a Capricorn Moon conjunct Sun in 12th, this little girl may find both of her parents emotionally unavailable. She may end up a party-girl like her mother, or maybe that 1st house Venus-Uranus conjunction will have more "hard-wired

Grabbed and tickled

Every once in a while, I come across something that really grabs my attention or tickles me in some way. A couple of things I've come across are a picture of a hole in the clouds (as well as the word virga[1]) at NASA's Astronomy Picture of the Day site, which also offered this 360 degree view from the Moon in glorious 1970's black and white, followed by a similar, current view from Mars . The clouds fascinated me. I have never seen or heard of such a phenomenon. And the Moon photograph fascinated me. I spent a good while looking at it, thinking how lovely the Moon looked, and probably subconsciously remembering the excitement of the lunar missions from my childhood. I can't say the picture of Mars grabbed me in the same way. I looked at it and thought, "Well, we finally get a good look – and it's boring ." I may feel differently later, but that was my first impression. Finally, this last tickle from the Internet Movie Database site. I was wat

Self-sabotaging update

I think the Universe heard me: My VCR just up and quit on me Monday night. I thought I'd be rushing around yesterday (since I had the day off work), trying to get it fixed, but no. I probably need to live without so much viewing right now.

New Year's Resolution?

I have a note hanging on my wall next to my desk. It reads, "Discipline is doing what is important to you." It's meant to be a reminder to me to get off my butt and not waste time. However, it's not working. I don't have the discipline necessary to follow the advice. I could speculate on why not. Some things that discipline would help me with are routines for giving myself a nice home (basically: Take time to toss the clutter) and to write The Great American Novel Or Something Close. I sit at the computer a lot, but it's mostly surfing and e-mail and Usenet. Addicting, that. But it don't write no novel. And I have ideas. I have something to type onto an electronic page. I have all the tools I need. But I don't do the discipline part. There's always something I've gotta do first. Yesterday, I finally found the urge to write – just as I realized that I had better go visit my grandma at the nursing home. Funny thing, someone else in