Apr 29, 2003

Bergen (hvor jeg jo bor) var velsignet med mye flott vær i april – og tørke – og gressbranner. Derfor ble jeg så glad lørdag da regnet kom. Og det regnet enda mer i dag, derfor dette, eh, diktet:

Det regner.
Regn som du kan høre, der det treffer vinduet.
Regn som renner og plasker.
Regn som samler seg i hundrevis av dråper på gesimser og trær.
Regn som gjør alt vått.
Regn som nærer vårblomstene og løvspretten.
Regn til å være innendørs i.
Regn til å tenke i.

Apr 28, 2003

I take comfort in that Blogger doesn't seem to blog any more often than I do. I am so impressed by those who have something to say every day. Well, I do, but nothing that I consider important or worth sharing at least. It's not enough that it tickles my mind; I like to think it should tickle yours, too.

This post is just thinking out loud. And about how things work out.

I give astrology readings every second Saturday at a café in town. Twice now I've had no customers. This past Saturday, when I woke up, I really didn't want to go in. I asked Myself why not, and Myself answered, "I'm not an astrologer." I got no where in attempting to find out what Myself thought she is, if not an astrologer. It was all an intellectual exercise; I wasn't able to get at my feelings.

So, I went to "work", not able to really focus and not interested in saying an affirmation for paying customers (as my good friend who reads the Tarot said I should). Instead, I repeated over and over to myself, "Divine Right Action in my life right now", which is an affirmation to let the Universe guide you.

Funny how things work out. Another astrologer was very social and talkative Saturday. We've never exchanged more than a "hello" before, but Saturday she talked about all sorts of stuff, mostly astrological and so it was a very enjoyable conversation for me. But there were some things she said: That there was no acceptance for astrology in Norway; that she couldn't make a living off of astrology alone, but also gave massages and healing treatments; that she never cared to advertise.

Over lunch later with my good friend who reads the Tarot, we discussed that last part – about advertising. You have to advertise, she said, and I know she's right. She has the spirit of a salesperson, anyway, which I don't. Still, some form of advertising, of putting myself out there, has to be done if I am to continue with this. That "if" is a bit more weighted than it may appear. I have to rethink where I am heading with this. I can sense that astrology is not my end goal; it is a tool for my process as well as for psychological insight, but I want something more/else (what I have to get back to talking to Myself about).

So Divine Right Action first let me listen to another astrologer's experience with customers or lack of (she has no repeats except for a couple of diehards who come back once a year for a Solar Return reading) and then to the experience of my "mentor". And I have a decision to make. I will continue to affirm "Divine Right Action in my life right now."

Apr 25, 2003

A co-worker was walking down the hall past my office this afternoon. She was hunting a scent, a pleasant scent. Somewhere in my vicinity she had smelled something she liked.

It turned out to be my office.

I had no explanation. I don't wear a lot of perfume and when I do, it's nothing heavy. Today I wasn't wearing any perfume at all. That lead to trying to sort out what possibly could be the source. I have no items in my office that smell.

It was almost like filling out a questionaire. Do you know the exact name and scent of your deodorant? Or shampoo? I read the label the first time I buy a product and use it and note the name only if shopping for a replacement. My brain operates on a need-to-know basis only. I impressed myself by actually knowing what products are on my body. They were more than I realized. I started with shampoo and shower gel, but then remembered the deodorant and hairspray.

Just please don't ask me what brand of toothpaste is currently in my bathroom. All I can remember is that it's in a longer than usual tube.

Apr 20, 2003

Et sikkert vårtegn for meg er linerla. Jeg synes den vesle trekkfuglen med sin grafiske fjærdrakt og konstant vipping på stjerten er så morsom å se på. Det er overtro forbundet med første gang man ser linerla om våren: Får du øye på linerla på bakken, blir det et rikt år. Står fuglen på steingrunn, blir det et magert år. Er fuglen på vingene når du ser den, møter du kjærligheten.

Apr 11, 2003

Been a while. Again.

Well, since last I wrote, I had a night out on the town. Sometimes you just have to immerse yourself in something else besides the usual and it had been a while since I had gone dancing or drunk anything stronger than coffee. So, some friends and I went to an 80's show, and got all nostalgic for the era of mullet hairdo's (hockeysveis, på norsk), hot pink and black clothes, pointy shoes and drum machines. The bartender was a jolly Black man from St. Louis, Missouri, and he was as magical with his hands as Tom Cruise in "Cocktail". I get so fascinated I end up drinking too much. Well, on the dance floor, we were rocking to old favorites and "head-banging". I gave myself a slight whiplash! And before we even made it to the nightclub, we were playing 80's tunes and drinking wine and dancing on the living room floor at my friend Lise's. I know it doesn't sound like much, but I had a great evening. Good friends and good music makes me happy.

I've been pretty happy the whole time, since last I wrote. I had lots of energy last week. Even felt like cooking dinner from scratch for me and my friend Torleif. A relaxing Friday evening with rockfish "burgers" and oven-cooked fresh vegetables, including three types of mushrooms. We parked ourselves in front of the DVD and saw "Under Suspicion".

I keep wondering where all my energy is coming from. I've been feeling so good both physically and emotionally. I wondered if it was because my department has moved to our building's new, added-on 5th floor and we've been walking up five flights of stairs for three weeks. Then I noticed that Mars has been transitting my 1st house. If it's Mars, I'm going to miss it. :-)

I've missed giving astrology readings, but will be back at the café tomorrow. I hope I get customers!

On another note, I've noticed that the war in Iraq has crept under my skin, after all. I have not bothered to read about it, and the only news I get is on the radio in the morning. I haven't been watching the TV news because it always starts with what seems like a quarter of an hour of war, and I want the news. How did I notice it got me, after all? Casual comments suggesting that Americans think with their Bibles, not their brains, has brought back my painful past. When I was a kid in Norway, the Vietnam war was raging. We as Americans were treated negatively by a lot of Norwegians, who were against the war. I was bullied at school, and many adults refused to speak to my grandparents. They never actually asked what we thought. They just assumed that being Americans, we were for the war. It looks to me like the same thing is happening again, some 30+ years later.

It helps to remember that the people of a country do not necessarily think or act like their government, as odd as that may sound. Certainly, not every single citizen agrees with their government!