May 27, 2008

What do I desire?

"What do I desire?" was the prompt on the prompt generator - and a good prompt it is.

Last night's seminar has (happily) given me a lot of inspiration and - desire. Desire to look seriously at what I really want out of life and the faith that I can make my desires realities. But I have to first clarify what I want.

I have never been concrete. I have never had definite plans. That whole business of writing down where I want to be in one year, five years, ten years, has never appealed to me. (Still doesn't, to tell the truth.) But in the meantime, where I am right now could use some tweaking. Life is good, basically, and yet there are little things that mar the goodness: My stomach, the situation at work, an increase in tagging on walls in my immediate neighborhood, making the place look trashy.

These are things that can bring one down, if very slowly. I'd like to not be affected by some of the grumbling and stress I'm noticing at work. I'd like to not get upset about unwanted graffiti or a loud baseball game too close to the windows. I can't stop these things; I can only not let them be my reality.

So I'm having fun with making a vision board, and thinking about what I want, what I would feel if I got it, etc. Every day I need to focus on my desires. The "power" word that comes to mind when I think of that is: Joy. Pure joy.

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